One never knows where life's adventures are going to lead. While shopping at a Book-a-Million store to pick up a copy of Lynn Hill's autobiographical masterpiece, Climbing Free: My Life in the Vertical World, I ran into Deborah Ford who was signing copies of her book The Grits (Girls Raised in the South) Guide to Life. I was immediately struck by Deborah's warmth, charm and radiance. These qualities drew me to her like a moth to light!

Deborah's daughter, Chesley, an astute young girl raised in the South, began talking to me about her Mom's book. That's how I know every bit of this tale is the God awful truth, for this sweet young girl could never tell a lie!

According to Chesley, her Mom came up with an idea for a T-shirt design while coaching soccer. She commissioned an artist to render her idea which was embroidered on T-shirts for the soccer team. This grew into a company to market the logo and acronym "GRITS" on women's apparel. The rest is history.

Chuck Leonard, Blue Miller and Greg Crowe, country western musicians in Nashville, were inspired to write a song about girls raised in the South which they entitled GRITS. The popular acclaim of the GRITS acronym then exploded across America! This brought Deborah to the attention of a New York publisher who asked her to write a book dealing with the GRITS acronym and theme. Apparently there are a lot of people interested in girls raised in the South as Deborah's T-shirts and book have done very well and the company she has founded, named what else but GRITS, Inc., has grown into a multimillion dollar enterprise. Not bad for a girl raised in the South, if I do say so myself.

Now I can certainly understand why GRITS (Girls Raised In the South) would be so popular, after all, my dear mother, the greatest Mom in the world, is a girl raised in the South. When I bought a copy of Deborah's book she was kind enough to autograph it, "For a Mom raised in the South. Much Love, Deborah Ford." What an outstanding Mother's Day present this would make! In fact, I gave Deborah's book to my Mom and she was most impressed with this fine lady and her manuscript. Now if my Mom likes a woman, you can bet she is a charm!

I haven't yet read Deborah's book, from cover to cover, which I know makes this a peculiar book review. However a brief skim of the contents and Introduction reveals that it is a guidebook, sort of a primer for Southern Belles. As a bachelor and naturalist whose expertise is studying fireflies and other creatures which glow, I'm probably not qualified to write a review about such a pristine and gentle subject. If this book were about fireflies, grizzly bears, wildlife in state or national parks which I have visited, photographed and studied, then I'd consider myself worthy to offer an opinion on GRITS. But quite frankly I don't feel I'm qualified to lavish praise or criticism upon Deborah's GRITS. But for what it's worth, these are my first impressions of Deborah and her guide to life for Southern Belles.

Deborah describes herself to patrons as a very trusting person. She loves working with children. With a degree in Physical Education, she also has worked with children having special education needs. Even from across a room she radiates a light that is reflected in The GRITS Guide to Life, through the presentation of an often humorous lore which elegantly portrays and promotes southern culture. Included are recipes, tales, quotes of whit and whim and other GRITS stuff. I don't want to tell you too much because I'd like you to buy Deborah's book and read it for yourself!

Although I've only briefly glanced through Deborah guide for GRITS, I can say this: Deborah Ford radiates warmth, goodwill and that spirit of southern hospitality typical of the deep South. In the very few minutes I was graced to be in the presence of Deborah and Chesley, I was touched by their charm and good upbringing. You could not go wrong reading her book for an insight and taste of what it means to be a girl raised in the South. In fact, if Chesley's great praise of her Mom exemplified the values and virtues which parent's need to be instilling in their children, then The GRITS Guide to Life would certainly be a wise read for southern Moms, or Moms anywhere in the country, looking to know and learn how to raise their children.

I promised to e-mail Deborah a copy of a photograph I took when I bought her book. I'll have to remember to do that, that I might qualify as a gentleman raised in the South! Ah, now that's a subject I know a bit about, given my Dad and his Dad were raised in the South, plus the fact I've spent a good deal of my own life being raised in the South. Hummm... would I qualify as a southern gentleman? Probably not, given my liberal view points and the fact that I'm an Army brat. Somehow I think this would disqualify me. But I've known my good share of girls raised in the South and can certainly highly recommend The GRITS Guide to Life to anyone who's affections gravitate toward Southern Belles. For if you want to win the heart of a girl raised in the South, you better learn what they are all about, because it isn't just grits and collard greens! Girls raised in the South are every bit as intelligent, athletic, adventurous and able of body, mind and soul as any women you'll ever meet. Deborah Ford and her daughter, Chesley, are a testament to that!

I wrote the above while sitting in my van in a Wal-Mart parking lot just after meeting Deborah, making some revisions thereafter. Something so profound about this woman struck me that I had to record my first impressions, for as you know, first impressions are everything! Then later the next day, after e-mailing Deborah a copy of the picture I took at her book signing shown above, I penned these thoughts.

To think I've been searching my whole life for creatures which glow, and practically in my own back yard there are gems in the hills so precious and divine they would belittle a king's ransom. No, these are not hard, cold minerals of which I speak, but living, breathing jewels, women who have blossomed like Magnolias, into angels, fragrant flowers, which sparkle and shine with bright, white light, their every word and thought a gem of wisdom, a sip of wine, a touch of the divine!

Yet should I pan for gold in this or that creek? I've never been one for prospecting the finer qualities of the feminine gender, settling rather for what wild flowers I might find in the fields of life. But here is a lady who certainly deserves to be flowered with roses, though I fear my words of praise would wilt long before affection would blossom. After all, what Southern Belle would fall in love with a dreamer, with one whose greatest wealth is inner treasures, cryptic phrases and verse, muse meant for inquiring minds, not angels.

Yes, this lady's angelic spirit radiates from afar reaching out to touch and grace everyone's life who chances to open a door, enter a room and stumble upon her presence. It is a light which blinds one so attune to looking for creatures which glow. Someone sure is lucky to have her as their wife and mother of their children.

I can only wonder if I'll ever find my very own Southern Belle, my GRITS? For GRITS isn't something you eat; GRITS is what you love! GIRTS is what you fall in love with and devote your whole life to cherishing and loving! GRITS is every man's dream; that most spectacular and outstanding woman who shines like a star! GRITS is the woman my father fell in love with and married, the woman who bore him four children and whom he loved until the day he died. GRITS is the girl of my dreams that I've yet to find! GRITS isn't just hominy; GRITS is pure delight!

Deborah Ford's The GRITS (Girls Raised In the South) Guide to Life is a must read for everyone who lives south of the Mason-Dixie line and is interested in southern culture, especially its women. The GRITS Guide to Life is also a must read for any "Yankees" who wonder just what it is Southern Belles are all about. In fact, I'd recommend this gem of a book upon your bookshelf regardless of what part of the country you live, as it has something for just about everyone and is jam packed full of treasures, little bits of whit and wisdom, from how to cook your grits and mix a Mint Julep to what make these lovely ladies of the South so special and great women to emulate.

I must admit, I'm not a woman, the gender this book is probably best suited for and most intended. I'm a bachelor and my interest in Southern Belles and gaining some insight into their minds and special charms stems from that circumstance. In fact, my introduction to The GRITS Guide to Life came by chance, or perhaps it was divine providence! I actually happened to run into Deborah Ford when she was in Montgomery, Alabama, at a book signing. From the moment I met Deborah and was introduced to The GRITS Guide to Life, I've been fascinated by what this lady has to say!

When Deborah's daughter, Chesley, one of the people to whom The GRITS Guide to Life is proudly dedicated, began talking to me about GRITS, I thought it would not be a book I'd be interested in reading. I usually dwell on topics meant for men. However, I purchased a copy of The GRITS Guide to Life and gave it to my mother as a Mother's Day present. This was, in fact, the perfect Mother's Day gift and she much enjoy reading The GRITS Guide to Life and apparently was already aware of Deborah Ford from having seen an interview of her on television and reading about her in the newspaper.

Of course all I knew about Deborah Ford is that she attracted me over to her book signing table like a moth to light! I'm not kidding in the least bit here. This woman is the epidmy of the very Southern Belles of which she writes. She radiates charm, style, grace and beauty from afar and any man who isn't blind could not enter a room, even a football stadium or convention center packed with Auburn and Alabama fans, and not notice this sparkle of light! Why I'm sure even a blind man would be drawn to her southern drawl like sailors to a siren's call ... though hopefully their fate would not be so gloom.

I mention this as The GRITS Guide to Life is all about girls raised in the South, their special qualities and distinguishing character. This book is not only a guide to life, but a primer in how to improve your own life, or that of your children, that they may sparkle and shine just like Deborah Ford, her children, or other Southern Belles of note.

In fact, it is this aspect of southern charm, or should I say enchantment, which has always been and certainly remains, top on the list of qualities which distinguish a Southern Belle; i.e., how their radiance attracts members of the opposite sex. Deborah even has a few pointer in this regard for those ladies looking for romance; they are in the chapter so aptly entitled, "Thank the Lord for Answered Prayers or The Grits Guide to Getting Your Man."

I believe this is very significant, in that the author has written a book which reflects the very qualities of her life which she displays by her very presence and being. She is, in fact, giving you the keys to being a better person, a woman of pride, dignity and worthy of respect. She tells you quite frankly that if the man you are with is more concerned about football, the car races or what's on the sports channel, its time to ditch him and start looking for someone who knows how to give you the attention you deserve. Well, I may not have said that as good as Deborah said it, but this gives you an idea about the no nonsense approach you will discover throughout The GRITS Guide to Life.

The GRITS Guide to Life really is for women of all ages. I know a few women who could really benefit from Deborah's book. In fact, some of these women are my very own relatives who have apparently forgotten their roots, become corrupted by the misplaced values of our hit and run society, and turned out to be what I'd call uncooked hominy! That is, girls who have forgotten their southern traditions, polite manners, dignity, pride, style, integrity and respect for their elders which is so much a part of southern culture.

The reason I mention this is that when I read through Deborah's book I was immediately struck by how the advice she gives is so applicable to recent events I have witnessed in my own life. I've seen women abused by men who tolerate the abuse and let it degrade them and ruin their lives. I've seen women treat their parents or grandparents like dirt to their own disgrace. I've seen women abuse their own lives with alcohol, drugs and loose behavior, not caring who they associate with or how this reflects upon their own life and may hurt them in the future. I've seen women lie, cheat, rant, rave and totally disgrace themselves and their kin, totally out of touch with those values and virtues traditionally taught to Southern Belles.

The GRITS Guide to Life certainly shines like a light and directs women toward a higher plateau, an enlightenment, that it is a must read for women who want to improve their own lives. If you know any women who might benefit from some good advice on how to live their lives, I recommend The GRITS Guide to Life. Why you could make it a stocking stuffer at Christmas time or a Valentine's Day present for your sweetheart in need of some southern culture. No, I'm not Deborah's publicist! I'm saying this from my heart as I know a lot of girls, all ages, could benefit from Deborah's book. Certainly men would suffer less if the women in our lives had the benefit of the good manners, virtues and pride of which Deborah speaks.

I would therefore recommend The GRITS Guide to Life for all women, everywhere. A little southern culture and Southern Belle pride could benefit every woman, regardless of race, religion or ethnic origin. In fact, after reading The GRITS Guide to Life I have a whole new outlook on women. I've had an Epiphany, what I can only describe as a sudden awareness that a GRITS is the kind of girl I'd really love to meet and marry. That is to say I've realized that I've been looking in the wrong direction, been spending too much time with women who lacked the type of qualities Deborah promotes in her wonderful book.

Perhaps this indicates men might also benefit from reading The GRITS Guide to Life; that is, that men would do good to learn what it is that makes a GRITS, a Southern Belle, and raise their standards (no pun intended), seeking women of good upbringing and schooling raised in accord to high ideals and virtues as reflected in their character and persona, those gem of the hill qualities, which make them outstanding and desirable women! Deborah mentions a few such women in her list of GRITS who have become Miss America, including Heather Whitestone, whom I'm proud to say went to Jacksonville State University, my almamater. Plus what could be more inspirational for women seeking success than to hear Deborah's story, of a soccer Mom who made a GRITS t-shirt, wrote and self-published GRITS book which sold over 42,000 copies, and now is being invited to church groups and television stations to talk about her achievements! It is like Deborah says, nothing so attracts a man as a successful woman, and it's an overwhelming aphrodisiac when the girl is a GRITS! Dolly Pardon might counter, "There is ONE THING more seductive than success -- and I've got it!" Can't argue with that as Dolly is a GRITS with enough grace, charm and style to fill any man's eyes ... or did she mean something eles?

I'm apparently not the first man to realize this nor the last. My grandfather on my mother's side, a Methodist Minister in Northern Alabama, married a Southern Belle. My father certainly knew the amorous appeal of Southern Belles as he married the good minister's daughter, a GRITS, who bore him four children and stayed by his side, through think and thin, until the day he died! Certainly the aspiration for southern women is reflected in the song, "GRITS," by Chuck Leonard, Blue Miller and Greg Crowe. Maybe you have heard this country-western melody on the radio, and recall the chorus:

I understand this popular song published by Screen Door Records and available on CD was actually inspired by the acronym GRITS as promoted by Deborah Ford on women's apparel. This is certainly a testament to the fact that Deborah has a life changing, life inspiring message to get across: that you can't go wrong emulating those virtues and values characteristis of a Southern Belle or Girl Raised In the South, what Deborah calls a "GRITS."

I might add that a man can't go wrong aspiring to make a GRITS his bride! After all, you could do worse. You could marry a girl raise north of the Mason-Dixie line! Now should your wonderful bride to be or wife be from New Jersey or New York, please realize I'm just kidding. I'm sure if one looks hard enough they might find the type of woman Deborah is talking about, a GRITS, that has relocated. After all, the job market isn't the best that it could be in the deep South.

Having discovered The GRITS Guide to Life, I can only wonder if I'll ever find my very own Southern Belle, my GRITS? For GRITS isn't something you eat; GRITS is what you love! A GRITS is the kind of girl you fall in love with and devote your whole life to cherishing and loving! A GRITS is every man's dream; that most spectacular and outstanding woman who shines like a star! A GRITS is the woman my father fell in love with and married, the woman who bore him four children and whom he loved until the day he died! A GRITS is the girl of my dreams that I've yet to find! GRITS isn't just hominy; GRITS is pure delight!

Apparently Amazon.com is really picky on what they will publish in the way of book reviews. They do not allow mention of timely events as book tours and book signings, so I could not tell my story about meeting Deborah at her book signing as part of a review. Also they do not allow posting URLs at to Deborah's site. And they want reviews to be short, not over 1,000 words, and prefer them to be under 300 words. Gee, I guess that means they tossed my initial review of The GRITS Guide to Life in the garbage can.

Learning this, I posted a much condensed review, giving Deborah's book a five star rating and encouraging others to read it. Hope the folks at Amazon.com don't find some other reason to ax this review.

The book is very well designed, illustrated and well organized. There are section on: The Basic Ingredients, Southern Style, Southern Hospitality, Strick'ly Southern and Southern Family. You'll get tips on everything from how to mix a Mint Julep to how to flirt southern style. Plus Deborah has some good tips on how to succeed in life and reach your dreams.

I liked GRITS as it made the perfect Mother's Day present! Also it gave me some insight into the feminine mystique of what it means to be a Southern Belle. That's good to know if you live in the South and wonder what makes these charming, well cultured pearls, these women born, bred and reared in the South, tick!

Deborah's book is a joyful, often humorous read. It will leave you feeling refreshed and inspired! I hope everyone enjoys The GRITS Guide to Life as much as I did! It is a pure delight!

TAL
8 April, 2003

LEGALIZE GRITS

The following letter to the editor was posted to various newspapers throughout Alabama, urging that GRITS be declared the official state acronym and hominy grits be made the official state breakfast food. The letter to legalize grits was widely published and circulated state-wide by several major newspapers including the Montgomery Advertiser and Tuscaloosa News. This letter was also sent to at least one district representatives in the Alabama Legislature. Apparently it was not taken very seriously, given his pompous reply which is also posted below:

GRITS LETTER WIDELY PUBLISHED

Dear Sir:

I would like to see the Alabama State Legislature pass a resolution or law to legalize GRITS; i.e., to make grits the official breakfast food of the State of Alabama and GRITS, meaning Girls Raised In The South, the official acronym of the state.

It is about time that the state legislature get off its rumps and pass some significant legislation, some laws that would be good for everyone. Certainly proclaiming grits the official Alabama breakfast food and GRITS the official state acronym would go a long way to improving the image of Alabama and instilling high virtues in our children.

The legislature seems to have a problem with adequately funding education, with reducing overcrowding in state prisons and even allocating enough money to keep jury court in session. Why it can't even fix a few cracks in the Capitol's Confederate war memorial without wasting $30,000.00 in scaffolding fees in the process!

At least a law legalizing grits would cost the tax payers of Alabama no money and be something every member of the legislature boosting of southern pride could agree upon. Plus, unlike the controversy surrounding the Ten Commandments, here is a law everyone can agree upon, whites and blacks, Christians and non-Christians, given everyone loves GRITS!

Certainly the State of Alabama can take pride in the fact that its country folk eat plenty of hominy and that there are no girls finer than the girls raised in the South. Therefore I think we should legalize GRITS and make it official, Alabama has pride in its Southern Belles and loves its GRITS!

Terry Lynch
28 April, 2003

Below is copy of notice from Senator Larry Dixon in regard to legalizing GRITS:

Subj: Re: ***Legalize GRITS: Girls Raised In The South***
Date: 4/28/03 4:49:28 PM Central Daylight Time
From: ldixon@albme.org (Larry Dixon)

Terry: I'm sorry, but, rieght now we need to be focused on the serious.

3000 teachers have been pink slipped. How do you think they would react to me passing such a Resolution instead of focusing on their situations. Maybe later.

dixon

After receipt of Larry Dixon's notice giving GRITS not a second thought, I decide to do something about this myself. So I prepared a Petition to Legalize GRITS and a Proclamation to Legalize GIRTS.

These documents may be freely reprinted and used in campaign to petition for the legalization of GRITS; i.e., to make GRITS the official acronym of the State of Alabama and hominy grits the official State of Alabama breakfast food. It is urged that mayors sign the Proclamation to Legalize GRITS and that this also be signed by the Governor of Alabama in an official reading and ceremony.

I figure it is about time the representatives of Alabama start paying attention to the people who elected them and do what they ask, instead of thinking they know what the people want. The people of Alabama want their GRITS, so if the legislature can't take a few minutes to attend to this very important issue, the people of Alabama should petition them, let their feelings known, and pressure the Legislature to legalize GRITS.

Thus anyone who wants to help legalize GRITS is welcome to use these documents. This is a serious issue because everyone who has a mother who was born and raised in the South owes their lives to a GRITS.

Certainly there are many serious and important issues before the Alabama State Legislatures. That is the exact point I am trying to make. The Legislatures needs to get off their rumps and legalize GRITS and do all the other important things which need to be done for the people of Alabama.

But if the legislature can not even legalize GRITS it proves my point: that the legislature is not doing its job. That should send a clear message to the people of Alabama come election day. If GRITS is not legalized all those opposed should be ousted from office. We do not need politicians who neither eat grits or support the legalization of GRITS!